时尚街拍网Things are really hotting up in Tom Hiddleston world.In case you need a quick recap of recent events:T-Hiddy is walking out with multimillionaire popstress Taylor Swift; he might be the next James Bond (a nail-biting national “What if?” matched only by the countdown to Brexit); and now he is posing in the fashion bible W, in white boxer shorts, like Playmate of the Month.This is it, peak Hiddleston, or very close to it.But, oh dear… something is not quite right.While Tom has all the right attributes, somehow hes not aceing it in the sexy image stakes.
I know what the stylists were thinking: classic, white, Steve McQueen, timeless, fresh, bingo! But its not workingShane Watson
I know what youre thinking:“This is 6ft 2in of prime Etonian.Hes man enough to talk to Anna Wintour, tie his own white tie and dance with Taylor Swift in public.The world has given his naked Hiddlebum a perfect 10 approval rating.What is the problem?”Well, lets start with…
The wrong boxers.If it was David Beckham he would be sprawled on the bed in tighty whities, accessorised with dog tags and a moody expression, and wed be saying:“Goodness!Wow!Rude,” instead of:“Mmm, not sure about that.”Im struggling to pinpoint the problem with these boxers.Too small?They are a bit gapey.They dont look like theyre his own, which is a bad start.I know what the stylists were thinking: classic, white, Steve McQueen, timeless, fresh, bingo!But its not working.You cant admire a man in his pants if he looks trapped and guilty.Those tight suits.Stylists are always putting actors in chimp jackets and thigh-gripping trousers.But the whole point of chunky legs like his is they are manly, honed during decades of contact sports, and unsuited to a skimpy fashion suit.It doesnt matter how hot your Hiddlebum is, nobody wants to see your jacket riding above it.Too much Smart in the Smart Casual.Im referring to the recent, loved-up photo opportunity on the rocks outside Swifters beach house.If you are going for a walk on the beach you cannot wear belted black jeans, suede chukka boots and a sky-blue ironed linen shirt and hope to pass for sexy.This is what you might wear to your bosss summer barbecue.Or, to meet Taylors mum and dad for brunch, in the City.(What is it with Etonians and zero casual footwear?)Fancy designer trunks.This is for future reference, because there will be swimming opportunities, if Swifter has anything to do with it, and those spenny patterned ones, which are standard posh boy wear, are not sexy on anyone under 45.The sexy option is board shorts.Similarly, ponytail bun.A very unbuttoned shirt.Dark glasses indoors.Just in case T-Hidd is tempted to try any combination, on hols, in the future.While he would struggle to get a bun going at the moment, the other two are not unheard of in polite society these days, and you never know.Thats about it for now.
Is it just me?Who has a drawer full of bras but only wears two of them?No it is not!According to new research, we bra wearers have tons of them yet we always end up rotating a couple of old favourites.I dont know what to say about this, other than that it is surprisingly easy to buy an unwearable bra.You get tantalised by the colour, to say nothing of the picture of Rosie Huntington Whiteley.You might think you could do with a pretty, fancy bra only to realise later that all the lacy froth and detailing looks like pocketfuls of rice under your shirt.Also, theres the simple fact: two is enough.
Is it OK to...Be gobsmacked to learn that when Danny Cipriani hit the town to celebrate beating the Barbarians (last year) he did it with sushi topped off with espresso martinis.Repeat, sushi?This would be the ideal celebration for Gwyneth Paltrow, possibly Tristram Hunt, but a rugby fly half?Sushi wouldnt sustain Kate Moss on a flight back from a French detox spa, never mind meathead planning a night on the lash.I cant get through an afternoon without biscuits if I make the mistake of choosing the models lunch of choice, even if I get the XL box for two.Sushi?What on earth?
